Thursday, May 24, 2007

BBQ SEASON ORIENTATION - For those that have forgotten!

BBQ rules

After months of cold and rainy weather, we are finally coming up
to summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh
your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking
activity, as it's the only type of cooking a 'real' man will do,
probably because there is an element of danger involved.

When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events
are put into motion:
Routine...

(1) The woman buys the food.
(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes
dessert.
(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray
along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes
it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

Here comes the important part:

(4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

More routine....

(5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
(6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning.
He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he
deals with the situation.

Important again:

(7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL
AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.


More routine....

(8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils,
napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.
(9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

And most important of all:

(10) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.
(11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And,
upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women....